Learning How to Dance in the Rain

 “Life isn’t about waiting for the storm to pass. It’s about learning how to dance in the rain.~ Vivian Greene

In the heat of the summer, I look for clues of my mom's existence in books, poems, and songs. I search for the echoes of her life, not wanting to forget her smile and her laugh. When she passed away a year ago, in the hardest hours of my grief, I resisted my tears, but now, when a card with her handwriting slips from a drawer or a photo of her surfaces, everything collapses. My grief is just love I want to give but cannot. Instead, it gathers in the corners of my eyes as a lump in my throat or the hollow part of my chest. 

A few years ago, my mom and I were excited about a fun summer activity when the clouds rolled in, and it started to rain. She looked at me and said, "I guess we will just have to let it rain." She demonstrated how to accept what is and move on in her quiet way. My self-imposed ideals of how life should be have tripped me up many times, but I hold her wisdom close to my heart and continue to learn how to dance in the rain.